Family Fortune Funny Answers

The funniest and best list of Family Fortunes answers. (Contestants from the ITV Family Fortunes game-show are asked to guess the most popular answers to questions posed in a survey.) Family Fortunes is still shown on TV and remains a rich source of hilariously funny answers like these below.

family fortunes answers

An instrument you can play while walking in the street: "A cello.."

A type of oil: "Sewing-machine oil.."

A word beginning with Z: "Xylophone.."

A slang word for a girl: "Slag.."

An animal with horns: "A bee..."

A medieval weapon: "Hand-grenade.."

Something made of wool: "A sheep.."

Something a bridegroom might wear: "A dress.."

Someone you wouldn't expect to see in a strip club: "Animals.."

An animal with a long tail: "A rabbit.."

Something a train-spotter would have in his pocket: "A magnifying glass.."

Something you put out for the birds: "Worms.."

A way to prevent snoring: "Put a pillow over his face.."

A word used to describe a very hot day: "A very hot day.."

A song from 'The Sound Of Music': "Dancing Queen.."
(Also from the same family: "I wake up each morning..", "The skies are blue..", and "Over the hills and far away..")

Someone who works early hours: "A burglar.."

Something made to be wheeled around: "A hammer.."

A reason for kneeling: "To be beheaded.."

A nickname for a slim person: "Slimmy.."

A measurement of liquid: "Paint.."

Something that's nice to wear next to your skin: "Pants.."

A famous Dick: "Carrot.."

A wild animal that's native to Britain: "A bear.."

Something that Father Christmas does when he comes to your house: "Feeds your pets.."

Something that comes in 7's: "Fingers.."

A vocalist known by only one name: "Michael Jackson.."

A yellow fruit: "Orange.."

An animal beginning with B: "Bullfrog.."

Something associated with Liverpool: "The Yellow Brick Road.."

A boy mentioned in a nursery rhyme: "Little Red Riding Hood.."

Something associated with Queen Victoria: "Her husbands.."

Something you hide in your socks when you go swimming: "Your legs.."

A place you would keep a pen: "A zoo.."

Something you beat: "An apple.."

Something associated with rain: "Water.."

An animal that lives in the English countryside: "A lion.."

Something you make into a ball: "Eggs.."

A game that uses a black ball: "Darts.."

A popular TV soap: "Dove.."

Other than 'carrier', a type of bag: "Horse.."

Something you might find in a garage: "a grand piano.."

Something a Frenchman would say Answer: "On Garde.."

A fast animal: "A hippo.."

Something you keep in the garden: "A cat.."

Something that gives you goosebumps: "Mumps.."

A character from Little Red Riding Hood: "Hansel and Gretel.."

Something that has a shell: "Batman.."

Any dance apart from the waltz: "The ball dance.."

Something a policeman might say: "Spread 'em.."

Something that frightens Dracula: "The King of the Vampires.."

A non-living object with legs: "A plant.."

An animal associated with a nursery rhyme: "Andy Pandy.."

A mode of transport that you can walk in: "Your shoes.."

An animal with big ears: "A bear.."

Something you do on water: "Wallpaper.."

A musical instrument you can play in the bath: "A drum kit.."

Something associated with Egypt: "Cigars.."

A part of your body you only have one of: "Your big toe.."

Something you pull: "A potato.."

An animal used as a form of transport: "A turtle.."

A famous Phil or Philip: "Phil Johnson.."

A habit people try to give up: "Spitting.."

A Thunderbirds character: "Doctor Spock.."

Another TV gameshow with the word 'family' in the title: "The Generation Game.."

A seaside resort on the south coast: " Rio de Janeiro.."

Something with a red light on it: "a Dalek.."

Something that makes you scream: "A squirrel.."

A food than can easily be eaten without chewing: "Chips.."

A type of record: "A floppy disk.."

A type of large cat: "Persian.."

A job that a working dog does: "A slave.."

Something people might be allergic to: "Skiing.."

A well known superstition: "Running in front of a car.."

Something you use a microchip in: "A fish-fryer.."

A game played in the dark: "Charades.."

A part of the body you have more than two of: "Arms.."

Something you find on a fire engine: "Coal.."

An item of clothing worn by the Three Muskateers: "A horse.."

An animal you see at the zoo: "Dog.."

Something you might do in a power cut: "Read a book.."

A famous Parisian landmark: "Hawaii.."

One of Harry Enfield's characters: "Sooty.."

A famous Irishman: "Disraeli.."

The first place detectives look for fingerprints: "The floor.."

Something you associate with the sea: "A coffin.."

A famous Arthur: "Shakespeare.."

A type of cut: "Skull.."

A weapon in the game of Cluedo: "Dice.."

Something people take to the beach: "Turkey.."

A reason someone digs a hole in the road: "Grave digger.."

An ingredient in chicken stuffing: "Chicken.."

Something a girl should know about a man before marrying him: "His name.."

A bird with a long neck: "A blackbird.."

An item of clothing a woman might borrow from a man: "Underpants.."

Something taken from a hotel as a souvenir: "The lamps.."

Something you keep in a garden shed: "A gardener.."

A famous Wild-West character: "Wild Bill Eacock.."

Something you'd associate with the three bears: "Red Riding Hood.."

Fruit used in fruit salad: "Cucumber.."

A method of cooking fish: "Cod.."

Something you borrow from your partner: "Shoes.."

Something with a hole in it: "A window.."

Something you do in the bathroom: "Decorate.."

The last thing you take off before going to bed: "Your feet.."